Erica Jong on the Madness of Modern Motherhood – WSJ.

Ms. Jong’s sanctimonious and holier-than-thou attitude towards international adoption and what she assumes is the motivation behind it is patently offensive. Beyond that, in rejecting non-traditional versions of motherhood she props up the very oppressive societal point of view she rails against. Being against adoption is the same as saying that any biological mother who gives up her child is a terrible, incompletely formed human and any person who raises a child who is not of their blood obviously isn’t doing it for bonds of family or love of the child, they have some ulterior motive. If motherhood is such a biological imperative than it follows biological families are unnatural. This backwards point of view  ruins the credibility of her entire article. ..and it’s beyond judgmental and obnoxious. What an ignorant, self-defeating cunt. What a waste.

Never-the-less…

It’s assumed that we can perfect our babies by the way we nurture them. Few of us question the idea, and American mothers and fathers run themselves ragged trying to mold exceptional children. It’s a highly competitive race. No parent wants to be told it all may be for naught, especially, say, a woman lawyer who has quit her firm to raise a child. She is assumed to be pursuing a higher goal, and hard work is supposed to pay off, whether in the office or at home.

…Such supposedly benign expectations victimize women far more than men have ever done. Attachment parenting, especially when combined with environmental correctness, has encouraged female victimization. Women feel not only that they must be ever-present for their children but also that they must breast-feed, make their own baby food and eschew disposable diapers. It’s a prison for mothers, and it represents as much of a backlash against women’s freedom as the right-to-life movement.

Giving up your life for your child creates expectations that are likely to be thwarted as the child, inevitably, attempts to detach. Nor does such hyper-attentive parenting help children to become independent adults. Kids who never have to solve problems for themselves come to believe that they can’t solve problems themselves.

Now we are hearing a new drumbeat: the idea that prenatal life determines post-natal life. …Does one glass of wine doom your child to fetal alcohol syndrome? No, but you could be forgiven for thinking so, judging by the hysterical reaction that often greets an expectant mother who dares to sip Chardonnay.

Sigh…